whee !!
its sunday today.
went to church (like duh)
gg to church every sunday is the normal routine.
i find it wierd not going to church.

eh, i dun mean following the same routine agn and agn.
i wasnt forced to attend church every sunday.
but i willing attend it with a thanksgiving heart everyweek.
in fact, church has been great support for me till this point.

my pastor, my teachers, my mentors, my frends.
were all of great help to me till this day.
and i lovee going to church.
i WANT, i WANT, i WANT to go to church everyday.

arh wells.
sermon was quite spiriture and encouraging.
it made me realised tht im one great sinner.
but god still so loved me.
it made me feel damn guilty of all tht ive done.

i feel like a bitch.
but god has accepted the way i am,
and he wants to give me another chance.
he's already given me many many chances.
he havent gave up on me.
for god so loved me.

i noe tht he loves me.
and i love him.
and he will always love me.
and i will always love him.

ohs wells.
im getting crappy.
thts bout it.
tata !

`let it go. god, take away all tht hurt frm me.

im bored.
charissaaa`s BORED

today's a BORING day.
i got nothing to blogg.
i feel like crap now.

my life is in a mess.
a total mess.
fuck.

boohoo.
todayy was preetty much worser than yesterday.
got back my maths test.
and i flung it once agn (as usual).
i did horriblely. eekksss.

ohs wells.
theres got to be moree to life.
i shant bored overr tht.
i shall just try harder.
yeppers.

i skipped music lesson today, together with:
alyssa. brenda. joanne. michelle and kylie. yupp.
cause we went to help ms ng with the speech day decorations.
and it was damn funny.
i laughed till i almost passed out (as usual).

we were suppose to carry 4 pots of palms to outside of the auditorium.
yeahh. carry pots of plants.
it sounds quite easy. but it wasnt tht simple aftr all.
all of them who carried the plants suffered frm face irritation.
the leaves of the palms were all scratching all overr their faces.
and it was damn itchy for them, and joanne even tasted it.

eekksss.
but charissaaa didnt carry the plants.
she was just standing arnd and laughing at how stupid they looked.
at all their expressions when the plants were irritating their faces.
haha. totally. damn funny.
aye. enough of laughing at them.

oh yeahh.
and todayy's family time and assembly period was cool.
they invited some local dance grp.
called 'ah hock and frends'
mm. it sounds quite cheena, but its not.
in fact, i find it quite cool.

okayss. there were four dancers who came to perform today.
they performed at the auditorium.
those dancers. those dancers.
tsk tsk. tsk.
they're damn flexible.

super superr superrr FLEXIBLE.
the way they dance and stretch was like woahh.
and charissaaa is so so so vry jealous of them.
but she's nvr gonna get flexibility like tht.
those dancers have been dancing for 10 yrs.

the whole thing was really nicee.
and i guess it was cool too.
hehh. sme moves they made were funny.
and it was quite funn watching.

tmr is the annually speech and prize giving day.
so called 'theresian awards day'
brenda and i are representing 2b.
guess its gonna be quite boring.
mm. i only look forward to see all the concert items.

and im suppose to go to sji with samantha for some catholic thing.
arghh. okayss. i shall be nicee and go with herr.

so yeahh. i shall stop heree.
thts bout it.
i need to use the toilet. hehh.

takkairee.
lovelove`

ohs wells.
todayy is quite a happy day for me.
havent reallyy been so happy for quite a longg time.
few reasons whyy charissaaa`s feeling so happy today.

-she scored 23/25 for herr sci test.
-she knew most of the ans to herr history test.
-she only ate a light lunch and nth else.
-she went for hockey trng.
-she didnt gt tempted by brenda, carolyn and ruth to eat macs (she just stared at them blankly and perhaps helplessly?).
-she climbed the 22x2 flight of stairs backk hme.

uhh. thts bout it.
i think im crazyy.
getting happy overr such lil stuffs.
but im really glad to be backk trng.
in fact. i MISSED my hockey trngs alot.
and im finally backk now.

it feels so good to be playing in the pitch agn.
and i feel damn nicee when im feel so hot.
its like im burning agn.
i used to hate tht last time.
cause i feel damn dhydrated everytime.
but today was different. damn wierd.

oh yeahh.
class was damn funny and interesting todayy.
especially furing sci lesson.
veena is superr funny.
you could haf just died looking at herr and listening to all the lame things she says.

she suree can sayy the lamest things uve everr heard.
she was playing with herr tube of glue.
and leilani pushed the glue to herr face.
and the glue stick smashed into herr spects. haha.
and she screamed (as usual).
she took out herr spects.

and she couldnt see anything (lols).
damn funny.
she was making a fuss and complaining to the class.
bout glue on herr spects.
and she told us a story.

it goes like this.

there was once, leilani went to herr hse.
they were playing or smth.
and leilani suddenly pushed veena to the wall.
as a result, she broke herr spects. hahas.
and she had to make a new pair (the one she's using nw).
and it looks damn ahma-fied.

she was complaining and whining bout all the harm leilani does to herr spects.
it was totally lame. and superr funny.
especially the sight of herr trying to clean the glue off her spects.
i laughed till i wanted to puke.
i swear tht veena can be one of the world's greatest joker.

anyways. hai-
mid yrs is coming.
eng paper is next friday.
and ive only 2 wks plus to my main papers.
this is getting so irritating.
i hate exams.
they suckk. eekksss.

no point whining bout hafing exams.
everyone goes thru tht after all.
at least we're all suffering together.
ive started a lil on my revision.
but i think i can do better.

uhh huhh.
thts bout it.
shall end heree.
cyas arnd in sch, ppl.

sleep tightt, rest well.

thtisthewaysheflies.

ohs wells.
todayy is quite a happy day for me.
havent reallyy been so happy for quite a longg time.
few reasons whyy charissaaa`s feeling so happy today.

-she scored 23/25 for herr sci test.
-she knew most of the ans to herr history test.
-she only ate a light lunch and nth else.
-she went for hockey trng.
-she didnt gt tempted by brenda, carolyn and ruth to eat macs (she just stared at them blankly and perhaps helplessly?).
-she climbed the 22x2 flight of stairs backk hme.

uhh. thts bout it.
i think im crazyy.
getting happy overr such lil stuffs.
but im really glad to be backk trng.
in fact. i MISSED my hockey trngs alot.
and im finally backk now.

it feels so good to be playing in the pitch agn.
and i feel damn nicee when im feel so hot.
its like im burning agn.
i used to hate tht last time.
cause i feel damn dhydrated everytime.
but today was different. damn wierd.

oh yeahh.
class was damn funny and interesting todayy.
especially furing sci lesson.
veena is superr funny.
you could haf just died looking at herr and listening to all the lame things she says.

she suree can sayy the lamest things uve everr heard.
she was playing with herr tube of glue.
and leilani pushed the glue to herr face.
and the glue stick smashed into herr spects. haha.
and she screamed (as usual).
she took out herr spects.

and she couldnt see anything (lols).
damn funny.
she was making a fuss and complaining to the class.
bout glue on herr spects.
and she told us a story.

it goes like this.

there was once, leilani went to herr hse.
they were playing or smth.
and leilani suddenly pushed veena to the wall.
as a result, she broke herr spects. hahas.
and she had to make a new pair (the one she's using nw).
and it looks damn ahma-fied.

she was complaining and whining bout all the harm leilani does to herr spects.
it was totally lame. and superr funny.
especially the sight of herr trying to clean the glue off her spects.
i laughed till i wanted to puke.
i swear tht veena can be one of the world's greatest joker.

anyways. hai-
mid yrs is coming.
eng paper is next friday.
and ive only 2 wks plus to my main papers.
this is getting so irritating.
i hate exams.
they suckk. eekksss.

no point whining bout hafing exams.
everyone goes thru tht after all.
at least we're all suffering together.
ive started a lil on my revision.
but i think i can do better.

uhh huhh.
thts bout it.
shall end heree.
cyas arnd in sch, ppl.

sleep tightt, rest well.

thtisthewaysheflies.

im beatt.
todayy was a longg day in sch.
sch ended at 2.15pm as usual.
was supposed to haf maths supplementry.
but it was cancelled.

so we went to do our art work.
we so had to complete it by todayy.
cause the deadline was tmr morning.
everyone was rushing the hell out of themselves.
and smth damn funny and stupid happened.

cyber lodge was in a total greatt mess.
everyone was talking and screaming at the top of their voices.
i was blasting tata young. sexaye. naughtyy. bitchyy.
and at the next lab, mr lee or smth was conducting webpage designing lessons.
he found us vry irritating.
so he came overr to give us a piece of his mind.

and oh gosh.
he sounded like total gay kaes.
and he waved his hands as he talked.
everyone was holding backk their laughter.
after all, he was like scolding us.
then when he stepped out of the lab.

smth crazyy happened.
the lab sort of like EXPLODED.
it exploded with all our laugher.
it was reallyy damn loudd.
cause the wayy he scolded us and the way he looked was damn funny.

then all of a sudden.
he stepped in the lab agn and screamed at the top of his voice.
he said tht we didnt respect him.
and he chased us out of the lab.
everyone had to leave immediately.
whadeheckk.

but a certain teacher with a kind soul gave us permission to go in the lab agn.
but we had to promise to be quiet.
and we manage to complete our work. just in time.
its like woahh.

but i swear tht it was damn funny.
you could haf just died laughing there.
totally.

uhh. and i dont think im gonna slp tonight.
cause i got so much assignments to be completed.
i dunno if i can complete them.
ive to draw my art piece and paint it.
and i still got a 4 chpt history test.

D-I-E

i think i better get going and start on my assignments.
hope tht everyone can complete their assignments.
and catch some slp tonightt. at least.
and i need some coffee now.

so yeahh.
thts bout it.
takkairee`

sowhatifithurts.
causeyoudontevencareanymore.

God's grace puts me in awesome wonderr.

sometimes i wonder if im walking alone in the dark.
sometimes i wonder if im falling into a dark hole.
sometimes i wonder if no one understands me.
sometimes i wonder if no one cares bout me.
sometimes i wonder if i could just die the next moment.

sometimes i feel so lost.
i feel tht my world is falling.
i feel tht my life is worthless.
i feel tht life has no meaning.

but at the darkest point of my life.
i see a light somewhere.
i see a spark of hope glowing.

God havent forsaken me.
though im such a sinner.
but God is still with me.
God is still leading me thru.
he kept his promise tht he will nvr forsake me.
and he was there when i needed him the most.

God's grace and mercy is always sufficient for us.
his mercy and grace is beyond the decriptions of words.
God's love is everr so sweettt.
its everr so truee.
it speaks nothing but truth.

God is Good. Praise the Lord!!

rightio.
todayy was preettyy bad.
woke up with a sore throat.
was feeling reallyy dehydrated in the morning.
but i guess im fine now.
thank god. i thought i was dying.

ohs wells.
im reallyy happy with myself.
cause at least i did smth constructive.
i didnt waste my time away.
i did 2 chpts of history notes kaes.
whaha. it was under the influence of carolyn though.

but i did it myself.
which means tht im a great too.
charissaaa` the greatt?
thts being too ego -laughs
or ratherr.
charissaaa` is a good girrl.

whheee!!
whooppeee!!

uhh. i want to skip p.e class tmr.
so im gonna ask mummy to write a letter to excuse me.
againn~
mr eric was preetty muchh vry pissed last week.
cause i came w/o a letter to excuse myself.
so i hafta get a letter to excuse myself tmr.
and pray tht he wont be pissed.

i shall end heree.
im tired.
and i need a rest.

__________`charissaaa loves you*__________

*cheerios*

on lovee`

some people think tht lovee is blind,
but i think lovee is beautiful.
everything and everyone can feel lovee.

birds, humans and animals
-all living creatures needs lovee.

lovee is the sweetest thing.
lovee is smth tht is beyond descriptions of words.
lovee can be anything you want it to be.
lovee makes the world go round.

lovee can hurt too.
lovee means letting someone you lovee go.
lovee means tearing when you think about the past.
lovee means hurting urself and always thinking of the best for someone you lovee.

lovee is a choice.

on lovee`

some people think tht lovee is blind,
but i think lovee is beautiful.
everything and everyone can feel lovee.

birds, humans and animals
-all living creatures needs lovee.

lovee is the sweetest thing.
lovee is smth tht is beyond descriptions of words.
lovee can be anything you want it to be.
lovee makes the world go round.

lovee can hurt too.
lovee means letting someone you lovee go.
lovee means tearing when you think about the past.
lovee means hurting urself and always thinking of the best for someone you lovee.

lovee is a choice.

i found this somewhere.
and i found it quite cutee.
it might sound contridicting.
but heree it goes`

teenagers.

they waer clothes too tightt.
they wear clothes too bigg.
they have funky hairstyles.
i think they need a wig.

they're allowed to stay out.
they're allowed to make out.
they're allowed to wear clothes.
they're allowed to hang out.

they're allowed to have boyfriends.
they're allowed to have girrlfrends.
they cant mind their business.
they're way far into frends.

they're snotty and concieted.
they think they all tht.
they make me want to puke.
but will i be like tht?

-laughs
this is damn funny.
cause it sounds like us.
anyhows. its just for funn.
dont take it to heart.
so yeahh.

ive been feeling reallyy down for the past week.
i dunno whyy im feeling this wayy.
nothing reallyy bad has happened.
but i feel damn sadd now.
maybe im being silly.

mid yrs are coming soon.
in a short month's time.
and im still in the play-my-life-awayy mood.
and i havent switched to the mugg-like-madd mood.

though i noe the consequences i'll get, if i do badly.
cause ive promise so many ppl tht i'll work hard.
do well for my mid yrs.
if not, at least show good improvments at least.
and i'll be letting all of them down if i do badly.

i noe i can do it.
i so wanted to give my best.
and show the world how much i could actually do.
but i just dun seem to be able to get into the study mood.
i noe time is running short for me.
but i shall still try my best.

______________________________________________

sometimes when i think bout the past.
i feel tht tears are flowing out of my eyes.
but im always holding them backk.
cause i noe tht i havent let myself or you down.
arghh. whateverr. im starting to think bout it agn.

so yeahh.
i shall keep myself busy.
takkairee ppl.
*cheerios*

iloveyoutoomuchtomakeyoustay.

godmusthafspentalilmoreetimeonyou*

ohs wells.
i think im gonna die todayy.
cause i got so much assignments.
and i havent like reallyy started on them.
and the worst thing is.
all those work tht havent been done are alr overdued.
for like so many days. and even weeks.

dammit.
i think its time i get started with all my work.
cause its alr april. its gonna be may soon.
and tht means. time files.
four months has been gone.
and ive like wasted all of it.
thts reallyy pure madness.

oh yeahh.
speaking of may.
i want to announce smth heree.
its a very important thing.
very very very important!!
its even moree important then getting married.

cause. on the luckiest day in may.
which is 7 may.
is a very important date.
its charissaaa`s birthdayy.
whheeee!!
-gRinS

*hint hint*
so you shld haf gotten my hint.
-laughs out loudd.

so yeahh.
takkaire.
study hard for the mid yrs.
*cheerios*

imreallyysorrybuturenottheone`

rightio.
sch started out prettehh well.
but it was reallyy bad towards the end.
very very very bad.
and i reallyy mean very BAD.

:(

we sort of had some stupid quarell.
cause we were all in a foul mood.
and charissaaa was pmsing like crazyy.
at tht exact time.
how 'exact' can tht be.
crap.

so now i understand what all of you haf thought of me.
now i noe tht everything was actually a bluff.
its reallyy bad how you can think of these things to sayy.
and its reallyy wierd how close we can be.
when you all havent reallyy haf accepted me as the way i am.

and saying tht ive been taking advantage of all of you.
and tht im treating all of you like my slaves?
oh god. how good can ur ideas get?
when did i treat you all as a slave? when did i?
its reallyy too hard for me to understand.

cause thru my conscience and heart.
i noe tht i havent been doing all tht.
and so i shall sayy this:

and i didnt hold my pride too high saying this.

i might haf been a lil too harsh on words.
cause i dunno what uve gone thru recently.
i will say sry for tht.
but i think uve all gotten smth wrong.
cause i havent been treating you all like a slave.
but i think if thts what you think.
pitying or feeling sorry for me so tht i'll not hurt myself.
and treating me like a friend and then smashing me right thru.
tht wasnt all tht i could haf thought of.
cause all of you havent understood charissaaa.
and havent accepted herr the way she is.
cause this is the wayy she is.
and now we dont owe each other anymore things.
if thts what you want.
it might just be an end to our everything.
maybe. if thts what you reallyy want.

tht shall be it.
i dun haf the mood to blogg anymoree.
and if you everr bother to read this.
i think uve gotten my point.

so yeahh.
takkaire peepos.

iveputmypridehighandiwillstillleavewithit`

ive been fighting my feelings.
ive been holding my tears backk.
i never wanted any tear to fall.
but now i think its time to let them go.

alrightt.
i shall try to be positive.
but i reallyy need to let my tears go.
so i shall go and cryy now.

ithurtstoomuchthaticantfeelit`

im getting panda eyes.
a lil pimple breakouts.
and its bad hairr dayy.
and that means. a vry vry bad thing.
charissaaa` is pmsing.
eekksss.

it can get reallyy bad if she starts pmsing.
eh. actually not reallyy larh.
charissaaa pms-es half of herr life.
does it makes a difference now that she's pmsing?
nononoo. it doesnt.
she is still as sweettt and nicee as everr. rightt?
so all you ppl shall sayy: yes. charissaaa is everr so sweettt and nicee (lols).

today was preetty exhausting.
i dunno whyy it seem so tiring.
maybe cause i stayed a lil too late ystd nightt.
i only fell asleep at bout close to 4a.m?
and woke up at 8a.m to get ready for church.

its easter sunday today.
the lil children celebrated easter todayy.
they had so much funn hunting for:
easter eggs. chocolates. sweettss. and many other stuffs.
all arnd the whole church.
its so funn and its damn cutee.

-imagine this.
lil boys and girrls wearing small lil clothes and shoes.
all running arnd the whole church.
looking for easter treats.
ohs. how cutee can that be.

charissaaa wants to join them too.
but sadly. she has alr grown up.
she's too old for all those easter treats.
further moree they'll just make herr fatt in the end.
and they will spoil herr dieting plan.

_______okayss. shall get serious now charissaaa`

and i think after this easter.
im beginning to feel God's presence in my life.
God's love is so sweettt.
God's love is so real.
God's love speaks the truth.

after all that ive experienced in my life.
after all that God haf done for me.
all the wonderous works that he haf worked in my life.
i think that i reallyy haf to give thanks for all that God haf given me.
even all the bad times that God haf put me thru.

its all and all of God's wonderful plan.
that made me feel God's presence.
its so sweettt. so real. and everr so true.
its always filled with mercy and grace.
something that is beyond words.
something that is unexplainable.

it made me realised that God is such a good God.
and im such a sinner.
but God still loves me.
and i'll always believe that.
all thru life's journey.
i'll always haf a God that will always be with me.

charissaaa shall grow up to be a strong girrl.
a girrl who loves God as much as he loves herr.
and she shall be a great living testimonial for God.
she will testify for God one day.

`alwaysgivethankswithagreatfulheart.

everything was a lil last minute todayy.
meeting ailin was last minute.
going to carolyn's church was last minute.
and many other last minute stuffs.
everything was last minute.

uhh. and after coming hme.
its even moree boringg.
and the worst thing is.

im starting my maths tuition tmr.
in church. after praise and worship.
im gonna haf maths tuition.
this is getting damn crazyy.

ohs wells.
its easter sundayy tmr.
gonna attend church agn.
im attending church frm.
fridayy to sundayy.

see. charissaaa's such a good girrl.
God loves herr. muah !
she loves God too. mwa!

so yeahh.
takkairee.
love you all lots.

butistillmissyou*
`andinoemyprinceisjustsomewherenear//.

lets try to be holy todayy.
ohs wells.

its good friday today.
its the day that jesus christ died.
for sinners like us.
on the old rugged cross.

three days frm now.
will be easter sundayy.
which is the day that jesus christ resurected.
but thats three days awayy.

so yeahh.
god loves me.
god loves you.
god loves everyone.

heree i go`

jesus loves all lil children.
all the children of the world.
red and yellow. blackk and white.
all are precious in his sightt.
jesus loves all lil children of the worldd!!

alrightt. haven i just sung a songg.
that i always use to sing when i was young.
okayss. im a lil girrl.
and god so loved me.
amen*

hehh. haven i been so holy todayy?
not playing or joking arnd.
but seriously.
its all my life's experience ive gone thru.
and i will always noe that.

god's grace and mercy is always sufficient for us.
god will nvr forsake us.
god's grace nvr fails to amazes me.
god is good. praise the lord.

for god so loved the world that he gave his one and only son.
jesus christ. and whoever believes in him.
shall not perish. but haf eternal life.
saint john 6:16

so yeahh.
takkaire peepos.

god loves you.

ohs wells.
im oohhs-sooo-superr-BORED.
and my legg hurtss.
lalalalalalalalalalalalalalaa =)